Social Expectations
Identity is a definition of a person. A description of self is referred to as self-identity. Self-identity is how a person describes who they are. A description of identity from our community is referred to as social identity. This social identity is a formation of the expectations society places on its members. It is social expectations that pressure a person into thinking about identity as who I should be, rather than as who I actually am. To have a strong sense of self-identity a person must form their identity based on who they are, not who others expect them to be. Because of this, the pressure of social expectations is the greatest obstacle for creating a strong sense self-identity.
A large portion of self-identity is a person’s choice of what future they follow after high school. When describing ourselves, we often refer to our career choices. Careers can be found in college, or in other forums such as volunteer work, military service, apprenticeships, and through work experience. The pressure of social expectations can limit student’s options during this stage of development by pushing all students to attend four-year universities.
Alexandra Robbins, in The Overacheivers, illustrates this pressure when she writes, “Millions of students are raised to believe that there is nothing more important than success, and nothing that reflects that success more than admittance to a top-tier college” (251). Under the pressure to achieve success by attending a four-year university, students are not allowed the opportunity to make a major identity decision for themselves. When students allow social expectations to influence major identity decisions, they are not making decisions based on their own personal beliefs. If students were to make this life decision based on who they are, rather than who they are expected to be, they would develop stronger self-identities.
Creation of a strong sense of self identity is also hindered by the social expectations placed on an individual due to identity markers. Gender and race are two markers that carry inherent social biases concerning identity. Society will classify an individual based on their identity markers and then expect that person to act a certain way. Individuals are pressured to have identities that fit into these cultural expectations. Queen Latifah illustrates the influence of social expectations on the identities of African-American woman when she writes, “For so long in this society, we have been given – and have allowed ourselves to take – the role of slave, concubine, mammy second class citizen, bitch, ho” (34). When African-American woman, or any individual with identity markers, falls to the pressures of social expectations they limit their own ability to form self identity.
The hindering effect of social expectations also affects individuals of other groups. Examples can be a male expected to be aggressive, an immigrant expected to be ignorant, a female expected to be submissive, a teen expected to be selfish, a bum expected to be lazy, or any number of other social expectations based on identity markers. It is easy for an individual to be influenced by these expectations and form their own self-identity based on who others believe they are. When an individual looks past these strong pressures and forms an identity without these influences, they will have a stronger sense of self identity. Queen Latifah exemplifies this as an African-American woman who ignored social expectations and refused to be the stereo typical bitch. Instead she defines herself with the statement “I am a queen” (34).
The pressures of social expectations can also take the form of judgment from others. Individuals who allow the judgment of others to control their own self-identity will have a weak sense of self. Lucy Grealy describes a rare moment in which her facial deformity was not a factor in her social interactions due to the mask she was wearing for Halloween. She writes, “I began to realize why I felt so good. No one could see me clearly. No one could see my face” (67). Here we see a young girl whose sense of self is strongly tied to the judgments others make of her; she is only able to have a strong sense of self when others are not judging her for her deformity. This clearly shows the relationship between negative social expectations and negative self-identity. The pressures of society’s judgments and expectations had a strong impact on the development of Greely’s sense of self. All children face some form of social pressure through the judgment of their peers.
Social expectations can pressure students into life decisions, individuals into negative social roles based on identity markers, and children into forming self-identities based on the negative judgments of others. The social expectations we face are a strong influence on our development of a strong sense of self identity. To create a strong sense of self-identity, individuals must look beyond who others expect them to be and focus on who they actually are. This pressure to conform to a socially expected identity is the greatest obstacle to forming a strong sense of self-identity.
Work Cited
Grealy, Lucy. “Masks.” Latterell 66-71
Latifah, Queen. “Who You Callin’ a Bitch?” Latterell 33-36
Latterell, Catherine. “Remix – Reading + Composing Culture.”
Boston, Bedford/St. Martins, 2006, Print
Robbins, Alexandra. “The Overachievers.” Latterell 250- 257
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